Paid a visit to my grandmother today and she currently lives in an old folks' home. I know it may not necessary be nice to place her there. I have had many friends asking me why she's been place there? Apparently, most people think it's cruel.
On the contrary, I personally think the old folks' home is a necessity in this time and day. Don't get me wrong because I am by no means giving a reason for anyone to ship their parents into an old folks' home.
My grandmother now lives in an old folks' home due to her stubborn personality, not wanting to live with her children. Last time she stayed with my family, she felt scared being alone my house because my family never came home until 9 to 10pm during the weekdays due to our busy schedule with work.
Along the way we tried asking to stay with some of my uncles and aunties, then she decided there was no place like her own home. Finally, we gave up and she got her way. She may have enjoyed staying in her own home but we were worried. Worried because she was all alone ever since my grandfather passed away a few years ago. She was in her early 70s then and someone in her 70s would be pretty cumbersome and most importantly, fragile.
Without the luxury of time, my family and I travel to visit her at most once every two months. Well, my family lives about 2 hours drive from where she lives since we are in different states.
Our worse fear materialised about 4 years ago, when she slipped and fell down in her home. Thankfully, my aunty found her on the floor in her home when she was paying her a visit one weekend. Had my aunty decided she not going to visit her that weekend, my grandmother would have probably been on the floor for God knows how long!
That's when a collective decision was made to have her live in an old folks' home. Today, she lives amongst many other old ladies in an old folks' home that separates men and women. There are caretakers who are around 24 hours a day to make sure everyone is fine.
The folks there get 4 balanced meals a day, and if anything happens we get a phone call from them. In the old folks' home, she gets to interact with the other folks around her and even if she doesn't really talk to them, at least she is around a crowd. I personally think, it gives her some form of mental comfort to know that they are others who are in the same position as her or worse off.
Ultimately, I get a peace of mind, my family and relatives get a peace of mind.
As much as the general mindset is that an old folks' home is a place to boot old folks who are deemed a burden to family. I personally think it provides a safe haven for old folks, a place where they are taken cared of. It is no form of replacement for family love but it does keep the old folks safe from harm.
Call it a necessary evil...................
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