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~a chip off the old block~

Sitting in front of my laptop tonight, I find myself trying to figure out what I should write today. It is probably one of those mental block days when ideas do not pop up like they usually do.

Anyway this evening, strangely as I drove into my home porch, I find myself thinking about the unusual quietness tonight. I guess, tonight no one is home since my parents are out for a function.

I find myself strangely missing the usual conversations I have with my dad. Usually when I get home, he'd be back already, other than the occassional nights he gets back later than I do because of business dealings.

The TV is placed fairly close to the porch so if he hears my car driving up the driveway, he'd usually try to get the gate for me although I'd rather he didn't get the gate for me because I'd feel bad about it. We'll usually greet each other and ask how has our day been. And I guess being a chip off the old block, I find myself naturally going for a bucket of water and cloth to start wiping my car if it is not raining. Being like him, I just can't stand driving a dirty car (I can't afford a new car, so I might as well make sure my old car stays like new right?).

While I wipe my car, he'd just hang around and talk to me. We'd talk about anything from government politics to cars and pretty much anything under the sun. Wiping my car whilst talking to him, time just flies like that and next thing you know 20 to 30 minutes has gone by. It is surprisingly nice to have some company while wiping my car.

I find myself reminiscing when I was still a little child, how I'd used to wait up for him till 2 or 3 in the morning to get the gate for him. My mom used to push me to bed about 8 at night but I'd quietly sneak out and just wait up for him, eventually she gave up persuading me to sleep early. I remember how he'd tell me and my elder brother that he's working very hard to make sure a roof stays above our heads. As a little 5 year old, I never truly understood what working hard was about but I knew that whenever he got back early from work he'd come running along to find my brother and I to play, and I clearly remember how happy he'd look calling our names as we run up to him to greet him.

For my dad to come out to start his own small engineering firm, to me is truly a feat given that I have seen many people try to open their own company just to see it go down in under a year or two. Albeit the fact that it is not a big conglomerate with its name known by half the globe, it has been around for 15 years and still going. As a young child, not seeing him during the day meant I had to wait up at night to see him.

Strangely, I never really realised it until today - how he now waits for me to get home, get the gate, accompany me while I wipe my car. That was what I used to do for him as a young boy - wait for him to get home, get the gate and accompany him while he wiped his car. Now that I think about it, I remember I used to play the cassette album Made In Heaven by Queen using his car stereo while both of us sang along whilst he was wiping his car, "I'm taking my ride with destiny, willing to play my part, living with painful memories, loving with all my heart; made in heaven, made in heaven! ........." I hope I got the lyrics right!

I do miss those times - times when you find you do things with your dad without having to worry about having your neighbours think you have a couple of loose screws in the head.

Above all, I believe it is those funny times that I have had with my dad that brings us so close. Many a times, I get friends of mine or even my dad's saying we hardly look like father-son combination but more of a friend-friend combination. I am pretty sure I will not be wrong to say that it is such idiosyncratic things that I have done with my dad that has created such close bonds between the both of us.

Of course there are and will be times when a father and son will knock heads on certain matters, which is simply an inherent part of life whether any of us like it or not. However, there is a saying in Malay "air yang ditetak tidak akan putus"; for those who understand Malay but cannot remember what this idiom means, shame on you................kidding! Anyway, the idiom basically stems from the literal fact that no matter how and what you use to cut/chop/slice water, it will always join back - like family ties, more often than not family arguments are often forgotten after a while.

Come to think of it, I am very lucky and blessed to have a dad like mine, and vice versa for my dad. Bonds like this are hard to come by and definitely cannot be purchased off the shelf. I can definitely learn from this when I become a father in the future, that's IF and WHEN I become one (although prospects do not seem too bright at this juncture! Guess I need to work on gaining more winning points with the opposite sex :P)

These are the little things I experience that makes going home something worth looking forward to! :)

Comments

  1. reading this entry made me reminiscing moments when i was still back at home. last time when i was still working in kl, no matter how late i reached home, there was always hot soup waiting for me in the kitchen; and my mom would come walking out from her room, making sure that i finished everything.. and also dad..he always made sure that there was enough supply of coke and chocolates in the fridge when i was having my exams, because i just simply need them when i felt stressful~~ no matter how much i have grown up, i guess, the bond is still there. and we are forever their lil kids =)

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