Many a times, we often see things from our perspective (i.e. from one viewpoint). There was this one time when I had a small discussion with a friend of mine and of course we couldn't come to terms on the subject matter. I could be wrong but I think, we were debating on the ever famous topic of "whether the egg or the chicken came first".
After about half an hour of back and forth comments, my friend finally just stopped and said, "you know what, I'd be more than happy to look at things from your point of view, but I simply cannot stick my head that far up my own rear end!". Both of us ended up laughing at the comment he made so spontaneously, but I have to admit there is some element of truth to his statement - we hardly look at things from a different perspective unless we are forced to.
My maternal side grandfather passed on about five years ago. He did not die from any disease in particular but simply from the expiry of his bodily functions. He literally died at work, at his office desk when everyone else thought he was taking nap not knowing he had already passed on. Until the very last second of his life, he refused to stay at home and insisted on going to work.
He died when he was 78 years of age if I recall rightly, by the time he was 75 years old I could clearly see him deteriorating - congestive heart problems, weak knees, bad cough and high blood pressure constantly making him go dizzy. I am sure he could have lived on longer if it weren't was his drinking habits during his younger days. Not that I can blame him for drinking since he worked in a labour intensive job.
At one point in time, I overheard him telling my mom, "look, if I ever end up in any form of intensive care, just pull the plug. I don't want to be a burden to any of my kids". I respected his decision and I deep down I knew that he knew what he was saying. He was far from being senile and neither was he even reaching that stage.
Few months before he passed on, we already noticed his physical deterioration getting more distinct and knew his time was coming to an end soon. One day, he was squatting down by the garden trying really hard to trim the wild grass and I overheard him talking to himself (not the exact words but something to this effect), "I hate being seen in this horrible condition! Once an independent man doing everything by my own, now humbled like a young child. *sigh*". About 2 months later, my parents got a phone call from my uncle breaking the news of his death.
Ironically, on his last birthday he mentioned something like, "I may not have been rich, but I had a lot of good food during my younger days, drank a lot more alchohol than I should have been drinking but what the heck? But you know what? We all got to go someday. If I die right now, I'd be happy and satisfied - all my kids doing fairly well, eaten all my favourite food and done what I have been tasked to do as a parent. If I ever end up in a miserable state, I'd rather be dead. I don't want any of my close ones to see me in a pitiful condition. I know all of you love me, and I love you guys too. But I don't want any of you to see me when I kick the bucket, I don't want any of you to be holding my hand when I die. That's what you guys want, not what I want. I want to leave this world happy and I don't want any of you crying by my bed. There are two sides to a coin - even when it comes to dying".
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
~a chip off the old block~
Sitting in front of my laptop tonight, I find myself trying to figure out what I should write today. It is probably one of those mental block days when ideas do not pop up like they usually do.
Anyway this evening, strangely as I drove into my home porch, I find myself thinking about the unusual quietness tonight. I guess, tonight no one is home since my parents are out for a function.
I find myself strangely missing the usual conversations I have with my dad. Usually when I get home, he'd be back already, other than the occassional nights he gets back later than I do because of business dealings.
The TV is placed fairly close to the porch so if he hears my car driving up the driveway, he'd usually try to get the gate for me although I'd rather he didn't get the gate for me because I'd feel bad about it. We'll usually greet each other and ask how has our day been. And I guess being a chip off the old block, I find myself naturally going for a bucket of water and cloth to start wiping my car if it is not raining. Being like him, I just can't stand driving a dirty car (I can't afford a new car, so I might as well make sure my old car stays like new right?).
While I wipe my car, he'd just hang around and talk to me. We'd talk about anything from government politics to cars and pretty much anything under the sun. Wiping my car whilst talking to him, time just flies like that and next thing you know 20 to 30 minutes has gone by. It is surprisingly nice to have some company while wiping my car.
I find myself reminiscing when I was still a little child, how I'd used to wait up for him till 2 or 3 in the morning to get the gate for him. My mom used to push me to bed about 8 at night but I'd quietly sneak out and just wait up for him, eventually she gave up persuading me to sleep early. I remember how he'd tell me and my elder brother that he's working very hard to make sure a roof stays above our heads. As a little 5 year old, I never truly understood what working hard was about but I knew that whenever he got back early from work he'd come running along to find my brother and I to play, and I clearly remember how happy he'd look calling our names as we run up to him to greet him.
For my dad to come out to start his own small engineering firm, to me is truly a feat given that I have seen many people try to open their own company just to see it go down in under a year or two. Albeit the fact that it is not a big conglomerate with its name known by half the globe, it has been around for 15 years and still going. As a young child, not seeing him during the day meant I had to wait up at night to see him.
Strangely, I never really realised it until today - how he now waits for me to get home, get the gate, accompany me while I wipe my car. That was what I used to do for him as a young boy - wait for him to get home, get the gate and accompany him while he wiped his car. Now that I think about it, I remember I used to play the cassette album Made In Heaven by Queen using his car stereo while both of us sang along whilst he was wiping his car, "I'm taking my ride with destiny, willing to play my part, living with painful memories, loving with all my heart; made in heaven, made in heaven! ........." I hope I got the lyrics right!
I do miss those times - times when you find you do things with your dad without having to worry about having your neighbours think you have a couple of loose screws in the head.
Above all, I believe it is those funny times that I have had with my dad that brings us so close. Many a times, I get friends of mine or even my dad's saying we hardly look like father-son combination but more of a friend-friend combination. I am pretty sure I will not be wrong to say that it is such idiosyncratic things that I have done with my dad that has created such close bonds between the both of us.
Of course there are and will be times when a father and son will knock heads on certain matters, which is simply an inherent part of life whether any of us like it or not. However, there is a saying in Malay "air yang ditetak tidak akan putus"; for those who understand Malay but cannot remember what this idiom means, shame on you................kidding! Anyway, the idiom basically stems from the literal fact that no matter how and what you use to cut/chop/slice water, it will always join back - like family ties, more often than not family arguments are often forgotten after a while.
Come to think of it, I am very lucky and blessed to have a dad like mine, and vice versa for my dad. Bonds like this are hard to come by and definitely cannot be purchased off the shelf. I can definitely learn from this when I become a father in the future, that's IF and WHEN I become one (although prospects do not seem too bright at this juncture! Guess I need to work on gaining more winning points with the opposite sex :P)
These are the little things I experience that makes going home something worth looking forward to! :)
Anyway this evening, strangely as I drove into my home porch, I find myself thinking about the unusual quietness tonight. I guess, tonight no one is home since my parents are out for a function.
I find myself strangely missing the usual conversations I have with my dad. Usually when I get home, he'd be back already, other than the occassional nights he gets back later than I do because of business dealings.
The TV is placed fairly close to the porch so if he hears my car driving up the driveway, he'd usually try to get the gate for me although I'd rather he didn't get the gate for me because I'd feel bad about it. We'll usually greet each other and ask how has our day been. And I guess being a chip off the old block, I find myself naturally going for a bucket of water and cloth to start wiping my car if it is not raining. Being like him, I just can't stand driving a dirty car (I can't afford a new car, so I might as well make sure my old car stays like new right?).
While I wipe my car, he'd just hang around and talk to me. We'd talk about anything from government politics to cars and pretty much anything under the sun. Wiping my car whilst talking to him, time just flies like that and next thing you know 20 to 30 minutes has gone by. It is surprisingly nice to have some company while wiping my car.
I find myself reminiscing when I was still a little child, how I'd used to wait up for him till 2 or 3 in the morning to get the gate for him. My mom used to push me to bed about 8 at night but I'd quietly sneak out and just wait up for him, eventually she gave up persuading me to sleep early. I remember how he'd tell me and my elder brother that he's working very hard to make sure a roof stays above our heads. As a little 5 year old, I never truly understood what working hard was about but I knew that whenever he got back early from work he'd come running along to find my brother and I to play, and I clearly remember how happy he'd look calling our names as we run up to him to greet him.
For my dad to come out to start his own small engineering firm, to me is truly a feat given that I have seen many people try to open their own company just to see it go down in under a year or two. Albeit the fact that it is not a big conglomerate with its name known by half the globe, it has been around for 15 years and still going. As a young child, not seeing him during the day meant I had to wait up at night to see him.
Strangely, I never really realised it until today - how he now waits for me to get home, get the gate, accompany me while I wipe my car. That was what I used to do for him as a young boy - wait for him to get home, get the gate and accompany him while he wiped his car. Now that I think about it, I remember I used to play the cassette album Made In Heaven by Queen using his car stereo while both of us sang along whilst he was wiping his car, "I'm taking my ride with destiny, willing to play my part, living with painful memories, loving with all my heart; made in heaven, made in heaven! ........." I hope I got the lyrics right!
I do miss those times - times when you find you do things with your dad without having to worry about having your neighbours think you have a couple of loose screws in the head.
Above all, I believe it is those funny times that I have had with my dad that brings us so close. Many a times, I get friends of mine or even my dad's saying we hardly look like father-son combination but more of a friend-friend combination. I am pretty sure I will not be wrong to say that it is such idiosyncratic things that I have done with my dad that has created such close bonds between the both of us.
Of course there are and will be times when a father and son will knock heads on certain matters, which is simply an inherent part of life whether any of us like it or not. However, there is a saying in Malay "air yang ditetak tidak akan putus"; for those who understand Malay but cannot remember what this idiom means, shame on you................kidding! Anyway, the idiom basically stems from the literal fact that no matter how and what you use to cut/chop/slice water, it will always join back - like family ties, more often than not family arguments are often forgotten after a while.
Come to think of it, I am very lucky and blessed to have a dad like mine, and vice versa for my dad. Bonds like this are hard to come by and definitely cannot be purchased off the shelf. I can definitely learn from this when I become a father in the future, that's IF and WHEN I become one (although prospects do not seem too bright at this juncture! Guess I need to work on gaining more winning points with the opposite sex :P)
These are the little things I experience that makes going home something worth looking forward to! :)
Saturday, October 18, 2008
About me and the ~Path of Time~
I have had some friend readers of mine asking me why I chose the name ~Path of Time~ and what got me started on this 'project'. After so many blog entries, I am finally going to give people a low down on why I started ~Path of Time~
Hi, I am Mick. Growing up with an innate liking for writing, I decided to blog about my life (not the most exciting of lives but it'll do for me) :) The ~Path of Time~ showcases my walk of life - life as what I see, hear and experience.
Why I chose the name ~Path of Time~? To me at least, living life is very much similar to walking through time. From the day of my birth to a walking child, teenager, then gradually transitioning into adulthood. Much can happen in one's life, ranging from happy moments to the sadest of times when one is down and out.
~Path of Time~ records my walk of life, sharing my experiences with everyone else at large with the hope that i might gather comments from people who have seen more than I have and hopefully learn from more experienced people. In turn, my experiences can hopefully help others in their own walk of life.
The past few years have not been an any easy ride for me with a lot of ups and downs that has made me, I believe a lil' more matured. There really is a lot out there and close to any form of surprises can just pop up and just look you straight in the eye!
The world is a big place and there is so much to learn. Where else to document my encounters if not on the ~Path of Time~? :)
I truly hope readers will enjoy reading my blog, and if you have suggestions, feel free to drop me a comment and I will see if I can accomodate the suggestions.
Hi, I am Mick. Growing up with an innate liking for writing, I decided to blog about my life (not the most exciting of lives but it'll do for me) :) The ~Path of Time~ showcases my walk of life - life as what I see, hear and experience.
Why I chose the name ~Path of Time~? To me at least, living life is very much similar to walking through time. From the day of my birth to a walking child, teenager, then gradually transitioning into adulthood. Much can happen in one's life, ranging from happy moments to the sadest of times when one is down and out.
~Path of Time~ records my walk of life, sharing my experiences with everyone else at large with the hope that i might gather comments from people who have seen more than I have and hopefully learn from more experienced people. In turn, my experiences can hopefully help others in their own walk of life.
The past few years have not been an any easy ride for me with a lot of ups and downs that has made me, I believe a lil' more matured. There really is a lot out there and close to any form of surprises can just pop up and just look you straight in the eye!
The world is a big place and there is so much to learn. Where else to document my encounters if not on the ~Path of Time~? :)
I truly hope readers will enjoy reading my blog, and if you have suggestions, feel free to drop me a comment and I will see if I can accomodate the suggestions.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Poverty...... how lucky we are and lending a hand to the needy~
Blog Action Day 2008 is tomorrow with this year's agenda on the subject of poverty. For this blog entry, I am going to write without doing any prior research like I always do because this time around, I will try to write bending towards what I feel deep down inside. The subject of poverty, I believe is a subject not touched often and probably does not even come across our mind and therefore requires an opinion from the heart and not the brain.
For starters, poverty as I far as I know is when a person earns less than USD2 in a month. Personally, I believe poverty is not something that can be measure solely based on monetary values. Having no proper shelter, water, food - that is poverty as well.
For most of us, poverty would not be on our minds. We have the Internet, good food, roofs over heads, a comfortable bed, air conditioning. Hence, there is probably no reason for us to think about poverty right? Showered with all the blessings of a comfortable life, we more often than not forget to be grateful for what we have and probably go on rambling about how you wished you had this, had that, many other "I wants".
Most of us may be unaware of this but poverty has been on the agenda for many years for many organisations like UNDP and many other NGOs. Most importantly, the change to alleviate poverty should and must start from individuals like you and I.
When I mean we can contribute to alleviating poverty, I do not mean you and I going around giving donations to people begging for money by the road sides or supermarkets or even restaurants. Allevating poverty is going to need something more substantial in substance. It needs job creation, institute to educate the needy, putting a halt to feeding fat cat executives who short change shareholders, putting an end to corruption and we have to start by not wasting resources. Resources here could be food, money, water; things we take for granted are like gold to many who truly need such novelties.
We can defeinitely help. Albeit the fact that our efforts may be small but it may pave the way for bigger improvements even if you and I may never see the change in our life time. Here's how we can help:
1. Start by not wasting food; all too often I see my peers, children and even grown ups leaving food unfinished;
2. Donate to the needy, but have your donation given to authorised organisations. If you are worried of any misuse that may happen to your money, donate in-kind;
3. Contribute to job creation - hiring one more janitor is not about having higher payroll costs, it also means you may get a cleaner toilet or even possibly less social problems;
4. Before you start rumbling about how pitiful of state you are in, think about some kid who wished he'd get a book to read - be grateful!
5. Create more awareness, by spreading the word to your friends, workmates, family members.
I believe you and I can truly make a difference. After all, by adding up all the small efforts we put in, we will definitely achieve something BIG!
For starters, poverty as I far as I know is when a person earns less than USD2 in a month. Personally, I believe poverty is not something that can be measure solely based on monetary values. Having no proper shelter, water, food - that is poverty as well.
For most of us, poverty would not be on our minds. We have the Internet, good food, roofs over heads, a comfortable bed, air conditioning. Hence, there is probably no reason for us to think about poverty right? Showered with all the blessings of a comfortable life, we more often than not forget to be grateful for what we have and probably go on rambling about how you wished you had this, had that, many other "I wants".
Most of us may be unaware of this but poverty has been on the agenda for many years for many organisations like UNDP and many other NGOs. Most importantly, the change to alleviate poverty should and must start from individuals like you and I.
When I mean we can contribute to alleviating poverty, I do not mean you and I going around giving donations to people begging for money by the road sides or supermarkets or even restaurants. Allevating poverty is going to need something more substantial in substance. It needs job creation, institute to educate the needy, putting a halt to feeding fat cat executives who short change shareholders, putting an end to corruption and we have to start by not wasting resources. Resources here could be food, money, water; things we take for granted are like gold to many who truly need such novelties.
We can defeinitely help. Albeit the fact that our efforts may be small but it may pave the way for bigger improvements even if you and I may never see the change in our life time. Here's how we can help:
1. Start by not wasting food; all too often I see my peers, children and even grown ups leaving food unfinished;
2. Donate to the needy, but have your donation given to authorised organisations. If you are worried of any misuse that may happen to your money, donate in-kind;
3. Contribute to job creation - hiring one more janitor is not about having higher payroll costs, it also means you may get a cleaner toilet or even possibly less social problems;
4. Before you start rumbling about how pitiful of state you are in, think about some kid who wished he'd get a book to read - be grateful!
5. Create more awareness, by spreading the word to your friends, workmates, family members.
I believe you and I can truly make a difference. After all, by adding up all the small efforts we put in, we will definitely achieve something BIG!
Sunday, October 5, 2008
5 more minutes.....
During this week, Wednesday to through Friday because of the festive seasons for our Muslims friends. Sadly, work got in the way of the holiday and I had to put aside all other plans I had for the three days and use the time to rush out some urgent matters for my superior. I expanded a fair bit of energy and effort to turnaround everything by the end of Friday so I could still have the weekend to myself.
Saturday evening was surprisingly cooling and I decided to had of to a nearby park to take a sit and enjoy the quietness. I haven't been fishing to close to a year now after my fishing mate went overseas to further his studies.
At the park, I shared the bench with a middle aged man who looked intently over this girl of maybe 5 or 6 years of age, who was cycling around the park. To kill boredom I thought I might as well break the silence and asked him, "Is that your daughter?". He replied with a nice smile, "Yup! That's my girl!".
It was reaching about 6 in the evening and he decided to call his daughter back, and his daughter replied "Dad, five more minutes please?". He then said okay. Five minutes went by and when he called his daughter back, she would ask for five more minutes. As I watched the sunset, the little kept asking for five more minutes and he'd say okay. Watching that happen, I made a passing statement, "Geez, you are a very patient father".
He then looked at me, and somehow I could see some sadness in his eyes. He then said, "Three years ago, I had a son who died at her age in a car accident. Being busy with work, I never really spent time with him and now I'd do anything to get just five more minutes with him. I don't want to repeat the mistake I made three years ago. Right now, she thinks she gets five more minutes to cycle, but in fact I get five more minutes to see her play."
After the two of them left when it was close to dark, I think I sat there thinking about what he said for a good half an hour; I snapped out of thinking when I realised some mosquito was biting me in the foot. Know what? Life is about priorities and 5 minutes to us could be a short time, or sometimes even dreadfully precious when work deadline lingers closely around the corner. But, sometimes 5 minutes isn't about rushing things out or meeting deadlines. 5 minutes could mean spending precious time with a loved one or never having a chance to spend that time anymore with a loved one.
Saturday evening was surprisingly cooling and I decided to had of to a nearby park to take a sit and enjoy the quietness. I haven't been fishing to close to a year now after my fishing mate went overseas to further his studies.
At the park, I shared the bench with a middle aged man who looked intently over this girl of maybe 5 or 6 years of age, who was cycling around the park. To kill boredom I thought I might as well break the silence and asked him, "Is that your daughter?". He replied with a nice smile, "Yup! That's my girl!".
It was reaching about 6 in the evening and he decided to call his daughter back, and his daughter replied "Dad, five more minutes please?". He then said okay. Five minutes went by and when he called his daughter back, she would ask for five more minutes. As I watched the sunset, the little kept asking for five more minutes and he'd say okay. Watching that happen, I made a passing statement, "Geez, you are a very patient father".
He then looked at me, and somehow I could see some sadness in his eyes. He then said, "Three years ago, I had a son who died at her age in a car accident. Being busy with work, I never really spent time with him and now I'd do anything to get just five more minutes with him. I don't want to repeat the mistake I made three years ago. Right now, she thinks she gets five more minutes to cycle, but in fact I get five more minutes to see her play."
After the two of them left when it was close to dark, I think I sat there thinking about what he said for a good half an hour; I snapped out of thinking when I realised some mosquito was biting me in the foot. Know what? Life is about priorities and 5 minutes to us could be a short time, or sometimes even dreadfully precious when work deadline lingers closely around the corner. But, sometimes 5 minutes isn't about rushing things out or meeting deadlines. 5 minutes could mean spending precious time with a loved one or never having a chance to spend that time anymore with a loved one.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Fighting the FLU....
I caught the flu some time end of last week, which turned into a fever over the weekend, and I lost my voice at the same time. End of the year, is usually the flu season for many countries especially with the rain that comes and go frequently causing a quick shift in the cold and hot weather.
So I am going to share some quick dos and don'ts to stay away from the FLU:
1. Always make sure you stay hydrated. Drink plenty of water and ocassionally get help from isotonic drinks (Gatorade, 100 PLUS, 7 Up Revive). Our body like engine need requires some cooling. In addition, a hydrated body is more effective in loosing up mucus thereby avoiding nasal congestion. Don't forget, mucus is a very good medium to attract the flu virus!
2. OTC medication can be a quick fix for the flu but make sure you do not have any form of allergy to these tables, and remember to read the instructions at the back of the box. At any point you are unsure of how to take those tablets, please ask a pharmacist or a doctor. Wrongly taking medications can wind up getting you into other dangerous health implications.
3. Anybiotics don't quite work for flu because antibiotics are used to treat bacterial infections and not virus infections. Viruses and bacteria are very different.
4. Practice good hygiene, washing your hands with soap and making sure you keep away from flu sufferers because flu is contagious. Best to keep your hands away from your nose, mouth or eyes - areas that provide easy access to viruses.
5. Lastly, stay away from alchohol and caffeine because these stuff dehydrate you and basically does the opposite of point 1 as explained earlier.
Hopefully these tips might help you stay away from the flu and keep healthy!!! ;)
So I am going to share some quick dos and don'ts to stay away from the FLU:
1. Always make sure you stay hydrated. Drink plenty of water and ocassionally get help from isotonic drinks (Gatorade, 100 PLUS, 7 Up Revive). Our body like engine need requires some cooling. In addition, a hydrated body is more effective in loosing up mucus thereby avoiding nasal congestion. Don't forget, mucus is a very good medium to attract the flu virus!
2. OTC medication can be a quick fix for the flu but make sure you do not have any form of allergy to these tables, and remember to read the instructions at the back of the box. At any point you are unsure of how to take those tablets, please ask a pharmacist or a doctor. Wrongly taking medications can wind up getting you into other dangerous health implications.
3. Anybiotics don't quite work for flu because antibiotics are used to treat bacterial infections and not virus infections. Viruses and bacteria are very different.
4. Practice good hygiene, washing your hands with soap and making sure you keep away from flu sufferers because flu is contagious. Best to keep your hands away from your nose, mouth or eyes - areas that provide easy access to viruses.
5. Lastly, stay away from alchohol and caffeine because these stuff dehydrate you and basically does the opposite of point 1 as explained earlier.
Hopefully these tips might help you stay away from the flu and keep healthy!!! ;)
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